Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Christmas Break



I made it through my first semester of nursing school and yes so did Eli. It wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. Looking back on the last 3 1/2 months is pretty surreal. I am proud of our accomplishments. I say our, because together we worked hard as a family to make this work.
I have learned to let go of some of my perfectionism's, which was probably the most difficult for me. I have made many mistakes and I have had some pretty awesome "you rock" moments. My sneak peak of nursing has left me completely intrigued. I don't ever want to forget or loose sight of what type of patient advocate I will be. If I ever loose sight of that, I do hope that someone hits me and hits me hard.
I met and worked side by side with some great nurses who have inspired me and I have worked with some tough ones. I prefer to focus on the great moments. Life will always bring out the good, bad and the ugly.
There were some moments during this semester that I thought to myself "what the hell am I doing here, and where is the exit". It scared me to think that I worked this hard for something I wasn't completely sure I really wanted. I don't know where I will end up but I do know now that I am where I need to be. There were moments of weakness, utter frustration, failure, and fear. Along with those came moments of accomplishment, relief, and happiness. The best feeling was knowing I made a difference in my patients life. That was the most overwhelming feeling of all! Everyone has a story and being trusted to listen to or be a part of that story is a gift. To be a part of someones life when they are vulnerable and hurting is a gift. To be able to relieve another human being of fear or illness for a moment and to see them smile was my biggest accomplishment. It didn't happen every time with every patient, but when it did, it was one of the most overwhelming feelings I have ever experienced.
I am looking forward to next semester. The first half my clinicals will be maternity and the second half I will be on the med-surg floor, both at Ingham Hospital. After next semester I will be a LPN. Then I can work as an LPN while I finish up the final 2 semesters and become a proud RN.
All I know for sure is that I am on Christmas Break. I can breathe again for a couple weeks and enjoy some down time. This family could use a little rest and relaxation, a little snuggle time will be nice too!
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